NOSEY BIO: Loud, brass, and tastelessly attired, I.B. Nosey is famed for his exuberant “Greetings, cybernuts! This is I.B. Nosey, your official unofficial reporter!” He seeks answers to the kind of probing questions no accredited journalist would deem intelligent, let alone newsworthy enough, to ask. Fleet of foot, wide of mouth, and fluent of tongue-in-cheek, I.B. Nosey’s unique interviewing style is comparable to none.

Winner of the Pukelitzer Award. Spokesman for Gum Drop Island’s confectionary plantation. Featured in InD’Tale magazine and The Woven Tale Press.


Tuesday, October 1, 2019

Feeling Nosey About Feeling Insecure? You're at the Right Place - ISWG October 2019


Meanwhile, over at the ISWG link...  

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Purpose: To share and encourage. Writers can express doubts and concerns without fear of appearing foolish or weak. Those who have been through the fire can offer assistance and guidance. It’s a safe haven for insecure writers of all kinds!

October 2 question - It's been said that the benefits of becoming a writer who does not read is that all your ideas are new and original. Everything you do is an extension of yourself, instead of a mixture of you and another author. On the other hand, how can you expect other people to want your writing, if you don't enjoy reading? What are your thoughts?

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NOSEY: Greetings, cybernuts! This is I.B. Nosey, your official unofficial reporter! It's my job, as the Pukelitzer Award winning journalist, to tell the news. And the news is that a whole month's gone by from our last Insecure Writers question groupey thing. Huh. Insecure writers only have one question each month. *scratches head* Hey, you! *points to insecure writer* Is that right?


INSECURE WRITER GUEST: We have questions. Lots of questions. Ya think we have only one? What are ya? Brain dead? Let me tell ya, we have lots of questions. Lots!

NOSEY: Er, uh. Sure. Sure. So... You think you can answer the Oct. 2nd question?

INSECURE WRITER GUEST: I could. If I wanted to. *sticks out tongue*

NOSEY: *back away* Allll right. Let me ask the next guest. What about you? *points*


WRITER GUEST 2: Me? *blushes* Gosh. Uh huh. I write. Yep. See my wittle sign? I wrote it. With me wittle finger. 

NOSEY: Let's see what it says. *squints* 'Pre-owned--' *jumps away* Hey, fella! Don't ya know that anything pre-owned is always free?

WRITER GUEST 2: But for just a dollah you can have your wery own twried and twrue Hollah Pop.

NOSEY: *turns away* Nuthin' doin'. Hm. *looks around* Who can be my next guest and answer Alex's question. Listen, you guys! *shouts into audience* Mr. Ninja Captain is waiting. He's got other blogs to travel to, you know. So, who can -- ?

WRITER GUEST 3: *waves hand* Oh, pick me! Pick me!


NOSEY: *frowns* So you're Smokey's replacement? Weird, 'cause unlike what your sign says I gotta tell ya, fella... *chuckles* you don't look anything like Brad Pitt.

WRITER GUEST 3: That's supposed to be Fad Britt. Licky wrote my sign with his fat wittle finger.

NOSEY: *rolls eyes* So, what's your answer?

FAD BRITT: Um, what was the question again?

NOSEY: *groans* Sheesh. It's 'Can you expect other people to want your writing if you don't enjoy reading?'

FAD BRITT: *brightens* Oh. That question. Well, sure, I enjoy reading. I want people to read my sign. Can you read my sign? It's a nice little sign. Isn't it nice? All the words have letters in 'em. 

NOSEY: That's not--

GUEST 1: *yells* Will you people shut up and let me concentrate? I'm trying to write up here!

FAD BRITT: *yells back* What d'ya think you're gonna write? In case you haven't noticed, your muse bulb is broken! 

LICKY: Uh huh. Bad bwroken bulbs are boo-boo's. Wanna a licky and feel better? *offers one*

BROKEN BULB GUEST: Don't talk to me about my bulb, Mr. Diddly Go-Wrong! Yeah, that's your real name. Wanna know how I know? *screams louder* 'Cause my bulb burns brighter than yours!

FAD BRITT (A.K.A. DIDDLY GO-WRONG) *gasps* Burns? You've got a fire up there? Quick! Quick! Grab a hose, grab a - grab a - Oh! Oh! Where's Smokey? Smokey, I need water, tears of a clown, anything wet! *runs in agitated circles*

LICKY: And for just a dollah--

NOSEY: .............



THEN:

*Snatches cell phone and punches in numbers with no fat wittle fingers, but with a couple of speedy thumbs*

NOSEY: *shouts into receiver* Miss Mae, what's going on with these insecure writers? Everything's out of control! You gotta--

MM: Hm. Yes, I see it on my screen. Don't worry, Nosey. Here's my response to Ninja Captain's question: 

In my humble opinion, writers must read. Not necessarily only books, but newspapers, scientific and medical journals - articles that are informative and contain facts that aid us in our own works. But also, for our own pleasure, we must read. Who doesn't enjoy Garfield, Dagwood, or The Lord of the Rings? Reading is a gift. We should treat it as such.

There, Nosey. Problem solved. *hangs up*

NOSEY: B - but -- What'd ya do? What'd ya do? *slowly glances around* Holy Salesman Look-a-like. Guess you just gotta mention an author's name and the whole room clears out.

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2 comments:

Alex J. Cavanaugh said...

Those were some pre-owned answers! Very funny, Nosey. You've done it again.

L. Diane Wolfe said...

No one wants a broke muse bulb.