NOSEY BIO: Loud, brass, and tastelessly attired, I.B. Nosey is famed for his exuberant “Greetings, cybernuts! This is I.B. Nosey, your official unofficial reporter!” He seeks answers to the kind of probing questions no accredited journalist would deem intelligent, let alone newsworthy enough, to ask. Fleet of foot, wide of mouth, and fluent of tongue-in-cheek, I.B. Nosey’s unique interviewing style is comparable to none.

Winner of the Pukelitzer Award. Spokesman for Gum Drop Island’s confectionary plantation. Featured in InD’Tale magazine and The Woven Tale Press.


Wednesday, February 7, 2018

February 2018 Insecure Writers Support Group Posting...Yeah


Go to this link --> : IWSG

NOSEY: Greetings, cybernuts! It's another month for...*checks calendar*...holy Cockroach Day, it's February already!



COCKROACH: You called?

NOSEY: *jumps* Aiii, what're ya doing here?

COCKROACH: Did you mean to say 'GroundHog Day'? Cause, like, honker dude, Chuckee G. Hog, is sleeping in today.

NOSEY: Yeah? He's taking a day off?

COCKROACH: Well...he's feeling kinda insecure, ya know. *looks gloomy* I know the feeling.

NOSEY: Aw, listen, roachie fella, you don't gotta feel so insecure around me, 'cause I like roaches! Yeah.

COCKROACH: *brightens* You don't say?

NOSEY: *reconsiders* Er, well, um....*clears throat* Maybe we can discuss this a little later, pal? I was kinda busy with introducing Alex J. Cavanaugh's Insecure Writer's Support Group blog post, ya know.

C. R. (short for Cockroach, dear readers): *grinds roachy teeth - yep, they've got 'em, all right* That Alex J. Cavanugh guy. D'ya know he ran my whole family outta one of his spaceship tales?



NOSEY: Is that right? *gives nervous laugh* Well...hm, that is...*inhales* As I was saying, Alex's purpose for the ISWG is:

C.R. *yawns*

NOSEY: *glances at C.R., and tries to speak again* Yeah, as I was saying, the purpose is:

To share and encourage. Writers can express doubts and concerns without fear of appearing foolish or weak. Those who have been through the fire can offer assistance and guidance. It’s a safe haven for insecure writers of all kinds!

C.R. *cleans antennae* I've crawled all over his computer screen, ya know.



NOSEY: Whose?

C.R.: Cavanaugh's. He always asks a question of the month too, don't he?

NOSEY: Don't horn in, roachy. I was getting to that...

C.R.: So what's the question?

NOSEY: Uhhh...

C.R.: I have it right here, Mr. Inept Reporter. *withdraws phone from cockroach vest pocket*

NOSEY: Watch it. *snarls* Nobody can call me inept. Call me when I'm in hot water, maybe.

C.R.: *glances up from where he's scrolling through phone* That don't make no kind of sense.

NOSEY: *blinks* Isn't that what I just said?

C.R.: Nosey, I -- oh, hey! Here it is: That ol' Alex who ran screaming off the ship when he saw me on the starboard control lever asks this month's question of 'What do you love about the genre you write in most often?'

NOSEY: *scratches head in puzzlement* Yeah, that's a -- I mean, um, Miss Mae, she -- well, she's writing all kinds of  stuff in her 'Ahoy, Mischaps!' series lately, so....


C.R.: So? Ain't she loving it?

NOSEY: Of course she's loving it. I'm in the stories!

C.R.: You are? Why?

NOSEY: Why? Cause I make the stories fun, el roachie-o. Yeah, 'cause Sir O. Yuri Wiseguy-eh, The Narrator, Heathcliff the Private Detective Possum, Dr. Ag O. Nee the 'Mad Scientist Extraordinaire', Spit the Stuttering Snake, Moose--

C.R.: *interrupts* Okay, okay, shut your wide-of-mouth already.  

NOSEY:  But I'm not finished, see. Miss Mae is enjoying writing the silliness of our tales because they're imaginative, creative, and original.

(let's hear it for originality, folks)

C.R.: *eyes Nosey's attire* Like your tweedy-weedy blazer, huh?

NOSEY: *puffs out chest* One of a kind, my little crawling insect friend. Heh heh. What'd ya think of that?

C.R.: I think it's missing one thing.

NOSEY: What'd ya mean? This blazer ain't missin' nuthin'! *hesitates* Uh, what's it need?

C.R.: Me! *leaps onto Nosey and his hairy, creepy, unshaved legs runs and zigs and zags and scurries and hurries...*


(what a tweedy-weedy blazer looks like from deep inside its tweedy-weedy threads)

NOSEY: Ack, ack! *whacks at C.R.* Don't tickle, don't tickle! Ooh, ooh, oh oh oh ohhhhhh.....*releases whoops of Nosey guffaws* Help! Help! Alex! Get this crazy bug off'n me! Aiiii....

Alex: *hiding in corner, whispers* Huh uh, Nosey. Not me! *runs, trips, runs, trips and speeds over to next blog....*  

             ROACHES!!!!


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Hey, yo, readers! Be nosey, and sign up for Miss Mae's --> newsletter! Why not? It's FREE!

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And, did you also know that a short tale about me, I.B. Nosey, your favorite intrepid internet reporter is FREE for you to simply download? Yes, come meet your Fated Destiny...Oh,Yeah! 


   

12 comments:

Truedessa said...

haha - This site is hilarious

Alex J. Cavanaugh said...

Good luck! He invades my ship again the phasers will be set to kill.

I.B. Nosey said...

@Trudessa, hey, glad to see ya and to know that you're Feeling Nosey today!


And, heh heh, thanks for the good words!

I.B. Nosey said...

@Alex, you can set the phrases, but....CR set 'em before you, so...just a Nosey warning, heh heh *cool Nosey wink at ya*

Megan Morgan said...

LOL I never thought a cockroach could be funny AND cute! ;) Such fun!

nashvillecats2 said...

This cheered me up, thanks for the laugh.

Yvonne.

Pat Garcia said...

I am sitting here at my desk smiling at your post. Great job! and very original.
Wishing you all the best in your writing.
Shalom aleichem,
Pat G @ EverythingMustChange

I.B. Nosey said...

@MeganMorgan, that cockroach's got nothing on me...except his hairy feet! Aiiii......

I.B. Nosey said...

@Nashville cats...

I.B. Nosey is always happy to pass his Nose around...yeah!

Thanks for Feeling Nosey today!

I.B. Nosey said...

@PatGarcia, much shalom to you, and Nosey is happy to bring you a smile!

Pat Hatt said...

Just bring a cat, a cockroach will then be eaten in no time flat...or played to death.

Tamara Narayan said...

Better stay away from my computer, Roach. I've got two attack cats who love to munch on bugs.